As a mom, I have always wondered if I’m doing a good job in this whole motherhood thing. I worry if I’m being too lenient, too harsh, too over-protective, if I’m playing with her enough, if she’s watching too much TV, if I take her to the park enough, if I socialize her enough, if I’m teaching her enough, etc, etc. Also, being a mom has made me tremendously cautious and aware of everything that I do. It constantly makes me think and re-think of how I’m behaving, the words that come out of my mouth, the way I say things, the vibe I create in our home, the way my husband and I talk to each other, the foods we eat, how caring and loving we are, how we socialize with other people… The list literally goes on and on.
Every day I wake up thinking that I want my daughter to have the best education possible. I want her to learn the important values and morals that make a good and respectable family. I want her to learn how to share, how to be kind, how to be social with other kids and people, how to be positive, how to be healthy, and most importantly, how to be happy.
Our daughter has taught me so much already that teaching her what I know seems like I’m returning her a favor; a huge favor that she has done for me of making me a better person and ultimately, a better mom. Bringing another child into this world scares me even more because I’ll have even more of a responsibility to raise them the right way. I don’t want to make mistakes, but unfortunately, that is not possible. And I know that. As a perfectionist, I’ve always wanted to know everything by the books. I am the step-by-step type of girl- a total bookworm. The problem is, parenthood didn’t come with a guide or with a step-by-step process for the correct way to raise a child. Raising a child comes from within. It comes from our hearts, our gut feelings, and inner intuition. Regardless of all the information that we can find in books, Google, or even friends and family, we as mothers, know deep inside what is best for our children.
Bringing our son to this world has also brought worry to my mind because I can’t help but think of how our daughter will feel after his arrival. Will she love him? Will she be upset at me for not giving her my full attention anymore? Will she be gentle with him? Will she love him as much as I’ll love them both? I’m assuming that all of these worries and concerns are normal as a mother. Everyday, I make the conscious decision of believing and calming myself down by remembering to trust the process and heart because that’s what gives me the strength and knowledge to do the right thing. Now and always.
What are your thoughts?