Marriage is so different from dating. Joey and I dated for 3 years before we decided to get married. It was 3 years of intense fun, traveling, and good times which lead us to another 2 years of unforgettable memories. Especially as a family. We’ve both learned a lot along the way, so I’m here to share the things that have made and still make our relationship and marriage simply AMAZING.
- Show Affection: Something that I absolutely loved and had me head over heels for Joey since day 1 is how affectionate he was with me. He loves touching me, kissing me, hugging me, holding my hand, and walking by my side wherever we go. He loves to show me how proud he feels of having me as his wife. However, even though I THOUGHT I was also being physically affectionate with him, he once brought to my attention that I wasn’t affectionate enough. We had a conversation about it and I am now aware and considerate of his feelings. Sometimes, you think you’re doing things right, but your partner might see or think of it differently. It’s important to be on the same page. I’m glad we were able to discuss it and make adjustments. Now, I’m all over him whenever I can. I certainly can’t complain!
- Do Special Gestures: Joey and I have always tried to impress each other with nice gestures. They’re not necessarily material or expensive things. For example, Joey will go to the grocery store (without me having to ask) and he’ll make sure to pick up the things that I absolutely love. This shows me how thoughtful and caring he is. He surprises me all the time. That to me is priceless. Even though I can’t get him material things, I always make him special, delicious, and romantic dinners and I make sure he’s well taken care of. Men appreciate the efforts and intentions.
- Be Honest: I have always been HUGE on this. I think that a true marriage consists of communication, respect, loyalty, and honesty. There is no reason to lie when you establish strong lines of communication. I have tried to be as open as I can with him so he is also open and willing to trust me and tell me whatever he needs to. I, without a doubt, do the same with him.
- Be Compassionate and Understanding: This has also been a huge key factor in our marriage. Joey and I had a major life adjustment when we had Julianna. Our dynamic changed because I had to become a stay-at-home mom and he is the provider. For that reason, we’ve had to be compassionate and understanding of each other’s roles and responsibilities. My husband is a true hard-worker and go-getter. He works long hours and endures all the financial stress of our family. I, on the other hand, am the one that raises our child and takes care of our household. They are 2 different types of responsibilities, but they both require a ton of work, patience, and time. I am considerate of his job and he is considerate and understanding of mine. Criticizing and/ or nagging each other is NOT a good way to get attention.
- Being Supportive: Joey and I have gone through a lot these past 5 years. We have gone through career changes, family losses, moves, sickness, becoming parents, and many more important milestones. We have been nothing but supportive through it all. We have never bashed or demeaned each other. No matter the situation. We’re a team and we stick together no matter what.
- Spend Time Together: Parenting can sometimes be extremely consuming. We definitely get wrapped up in our daily routines and forget that we even exist. However, the important part of it is recognizing that you need the time off to reconnect and fall in love again. Joey and I have had the opportunity to take several vacations together and they have been extremely amazing and refreshing. We disconnect from the real world and get consumed with each other. I love it! If not, we definitely make time to have dinner or drink somewhere. (Even though the majority of the time we end up talking about how cute Julianna is! Oh! The joys of parenthood!)
- Say “I Love You”: These words just mean so much! At least they do for me. I try to express my feelings every time I can without being overwhelming. Whenever I feel the need to, I definitely let him know how proud I am to be his wife, how happy he makes me, and how much I love him. He does the same too! I have to say he writes the sweetest things on birthday cards, mother’s day cards, Christmas cards, etc. His words always make me cry! So sweet.
- Compliment Each Other: I think it’s nice to feel and look good for each other. I think being visually attractive towards each other is very important in any relationship. Being in shape, looking good, and dressing to impress is key in our books. It’s nice to hear him say: “Baby, you look beautiful!” Just as much as we like to feel appreciated, men like to be praised and complimented as well. I like telling him how good a particular shirt looks on him, or how sexy his butt looks as he’s walking away. Simple things like that keep the spark going!
- Be sexual: Just as much as we like to receive the first touch and the first kiss, men also like when we initiate sex. Men like to be aroused, so it’s your decision on how to make that happen.
- Have a Positive Vibe: Nagging can be super annoying for anybody. Complaining is not the way to get what you want. It’s important to be delicate with how things are said in a relationship. The way you ask for something and the way it is interpreted can be completely different. Being respectful of each other is extremely important when getting your point across. I like to be careful with how I say things because words can never be forgotten. To me, they’re written in stone. So it’s important to choose your words wisely.
I hope these tips are helpful in your relationship because they are the laws in our marriage. I’m sharing a beautiful video I recently saw down below. Enjoy! Feel free to leave a comment below on how you keep your marriage happy!